Maria sat in the darkness of her cupboard listening to the noises of the outside world as she often did when she found herself alone in the dank room as her punishment.
Somewhere in the distance of the city she could hear the sound of car horns being pressed angrily by their owners and she couldn’t help but wonder if it was that time of the day where everyone started to head home from work. Although she was just six years old, Maria had a pretty good grasp of what the world was like.
People where angry all the time. It didn’t really matter what time of the day it was, rush hour or not, they were always angry about something. Angry for being late for work. Angry for getting home late from work. Angry because their daughter accidentally dropped a plate while trying to clean it in scolding hot water.
They were just angry period.
She continued to sit there on the mouldy old matters her father kept in the cupboard for occasions when she had to be punished. Maria could never understand why it was called punishment though. The first couple of times she had been frightened of the darkness. It was cold and seemed to envelope her entire being, but after the fourth and fifth times of being locked away she started to welcome its comforting quietness.
There was nothing in the cupboard except her, the mattress and the steel chains wrapped around her ankles and neck to stop her from trying to sneak out while her father was busy with his friends in the living room.
It was the thought of those friends, horrible drunken men who smelled really bad in every way possible; that did make Maria feel frightened. It wasn’t because they were drunk, it was more what her father allowed them to do to her when they were drunk.
They touched her in places that she felt was wrong and on more than one occasion they hurt her private area down below and made it bleed. When that happened her father was quick to drag her back into the cupboard and he would leave her there for hours, bleeding, while he continued to entertain his friends until they eventually left.
On one occasion, Maria remembered one of them, a tall, gaunt looking man with greasy hair, taking pictures with his phone which he held under the stained white night dress she wore almost every day now.
She recalled standing there and smiling just like she had been asked to while her father’s friend took his pictures. She had no idea how they turned out because as soon as he was done she was dragged straight back into the cupboard.
Maria let her small fingers run across the ragged scar which stretched from both ends of her throat. The thought of how she got the scar was one she didn’t want to dwell on, but she could always clearly recall that for a week afterwards her father dotted on her like the way he was supposed to.
During that brief time she could do no wrong, but on the downside she quickly realized that she could no longer speak either.
As her mind drifted to those brief but happier days Maria couldn’t help but wonder if her dad, her real dad, the kind and caring man who had loved her and carried her on his shoulders when they first moved into the small apartment, would come back again.
She missed him and couldn’t stand the man who had taken his place. A constantly drunk and angry man who seemed to hate everything she did no matter how innocent it was.
Her young mind tried to recall her father’s smile, not the wicked grin he wore most days now, but his real smile. The one that lit up his eyes and her heart when she saw it. She almost had an image in her head when there was a crash, followed by the by the sound of a door hitting against a wall.
He was coming for her. Quickly she got to her feet, her heart rising with both hope and fear as whoever was in the bedroom beyond her cupboard got closer.
The chains around her ankles rattled a little as she waited to be freed. The air filled with the noise of a key being rattled inside a lock before being turned and then finally there was a soft clunk as the lock was released. Moments later the cupboard door swung open flooding the tiny room with light and forcing Maria to squint her eyes.
It took a few seconds for her vision to adjust and when it did she could feel her heart sink. The man towering over her was fat, his belly hanging over the waistband of his trousers. His eyes where bloodshot from two much drinking and not enough sleep. The luxurious mop of brown hair that once graced his head was now gone and Maria could see nothing about her father that was remotely like the man who had once carried her in his arms all the way across the city to the hospital when he accidentally threw a plate at her and it hit her in the throat causing a dangerously deep wound.
‘Right, you little bitch,’ he said, his voice course from cigarette smoke amongst other things. ‘This is your last chance to behave yourself, my friends want to see you and if you don’t do what they say it’s straight back in here with you.’
Maria nodded her understanding and quickly tapped her foot and held her belly as she looked up at her father. She desperately needed to pee, and hadn’t realized that until she stood up waiting for him to free her from her tiny prison.
‘You need a piss?’
Maria nodded again rapidly. She wasn’t sure if she was going to make it to the bathroom regardless of how quick he was at setting her free.
But she continued to watch as her father knelt down and used a small key to unlock the padlock which held her chains to the floor.
‘Make it quick,’ her father grunted. ‘My friends don’t want to be near you when you piss yourself. It turns them off.’
As she quickly moved passed her father, who followed after, and made her way out into the hallway of the dingy apartment, Maria couldn’t help but wonder how a person could be turned on or off. It was a fantastic concept in her young mind. How great it would be if one could simply switch off a person who was really annoying or who wanted to hurt you in some way. It was a great concept and she hoped to learn how to do it someday.
The bathroom was only a few feet away from her father’s bedroom, and on the other side of it was her own room, but she couldn’t remember what it looked like inside it had been so long since she had last been in it. Further down the hallway was the sitting room and as she turned to enter the bathroom she could just make out the long greasy hair of the man who had taken pictures under her night dress, as he sat on the chair nearest the door.
Without looking any longer than she had to, Maria entered the bathroom and closed the door behind her. She half expected her father to come bargaining in straight after her, but this time he waited outside.
Sensing she didn’t have much time, Maria quietly slid the small bolt on the door, it wouldn’t take much for her father to break it, but it would at least give her a little more privacy for just a bit longer.
As she sat on the toilet seat, listening to the sound of her urine splash into the water in the bowl, she glanced around the small room. There was enough space for a bath, sink and toilet seat and not much else. Above the sink was a narrow window which was normally always closed tight.
To her surprise though, the window was actually open a little. Not enough even for her small frame to slip through but enough that she might be able to open it up some more.
She thought about how angry her father would be if he caught her near the window and the days upon days of being locked in that cupboard as her punishment. With those thoughts swirling around in her mind she glanced at her legs and the dry streaks of blood on the inside of both thighs.
She couldn’t remember the last time she had been put in a bath, in fact she could never really remember being in the bath since they had moved into the apartment when she was five. She looked over at the window again, her little mind trying to decide if she should try and escape from her father and his friends or stay and take whatever punishment would be met out in her direction.
‘God damn it Maria, hurry up in there or I’ll strangle you with your chains,’ came her father’s voice from the other end of the door.
Quickly wiping herself dry, Maria slid off the toilet seat and headed over to the sink. Her chains rattled a little as she climbed on to the edge of the bath first and then up on to the sink so she was standing in its bowl.
‘Maria, what the hell are you doing in there!?’ Screamed her father, but Maria was no longer paying any attention to him.
Using what little strength she had, the little girl used both hands to try and pull the window up and open far enough for her to climb out. Sweat matted her long pink hair to her forehead. Her father had once told her she was a freak of nature, whatever that was, because she had been born with naturally pink hair and not brown like his.
Surprisingly the window began to move upwards under her strength. Maria couldn’t believe it, it took only a few seconds for her to create an opening big enough to climb through, however when she looked outside all she could see was a thin sandstone ledge and beyond that many feet below was the city streets. She could see tiny objects moving below which she was certain was people.
Her willingness to escape was almost starting to wane when her father screamed her name from beyond the bathroom door. It was enough to give her the jolt into action she needed and without any further hesitation she started to climb out on to the ledge.
Still on her hands and knees she was almost completely outside when she heard the bathroom door crash open. She couldn’t see him, but she could hear her father snorting with rage and then for the briefest of seconds he went deadly silent.
‘Maria, what are you doing, get back in here at once!?’ He shouted and charged towards the sink.
A small smile began to cross Maria’s lips as she finally made it out on to the ledge. She had no idea where to go next, but for the first time since her father carried her to the hospital with a cut throat she was outside and breathing fresh air.
She started to crawl along the edge when she suddenly realized that she couldn’t move any further forward. It quickly became apparent to her that she was actually moving backwards, like her body was being pulled back to that horrible cupboard where she spent most of her day.
It was then that she heard the rattle of the chains around her ankles. It was those very chains that her father was pulling on to bring her back to him. Strangely enough he didn’t look angry this time. In fact he looked worried which was an expression Maria had never seen on his face before.
She tried to pull against him but her strength was no match for his and as he continued to pull at her chains, her hands slipped from under her and without warning she was falling. The last time she would ever hear her father’s voice was when he called her name as she started to fall towards the streets below.
Then suddenly there was a jolt as her father held on to the chain with all his might, but years of abusing his body had left him with little energy and the chain he gripped so tightly began to slip from his sweaty palms.
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